I am a citizen of the United States, and I reside in the city of New York. My name is…

I am the Mayor of the only city in the world. I am the Mayor of the City of Vanity, which lies in the broad street of Principal, and I rule over the inhabitants thereof.…

I am a friend of the human race. I have no respect of persons, and I know no difference between the high and the low, the rich and the poor, the learned and the ignorant, the good…